Earlier this year I took a course on social networking sites, which was fascinating, to say the least. It allowed me to not only study the social media sites that seem to be taking over our lives, but opened my eyes to an academic study of personal identities and social interactions.
One of the most interesting things I learned about was the concept of social capital, which is an odd idea and kind of hard to define–but the more I think about it, the more intriguing it becomes. In a very basic sense, I would say that social capital is the goodwill that arises from and sustains our relationships with others. You could think of it as the favors that people do for eachother, either altruistically because they want to help the other, or selfishly, because they think it will benefit themselves later on.
I say it’s an odd idea because it feels weird to think of your relationships in terms of ‘capital.’ Social capital is regarded by some as literally capital–in the same category as financial, physical and human capital. You can trade money for a new weed wacker at the local garden supply store if you need one, or you can go to your neighbor and trade him your indebtedness to borrow his tools. If your relationship is a good one, he will let you borrow the weed wacker because he believes that at some future time he can ask you for a similar favor.
All this seems perfectly natural, but when you extend this idea of trading favors (dirty!) from that neighbor example to closer friends you might start to feel a little sticky. Your bestie might ask you to look in on her cat during her next vacation, which of course you’ll say yes to because, well, she’s your bestie. You just want to be nice and help her out. But wouldn’t you expect her to do the same for you? I doubt you’ll agree to catsit while consciously thinking, “Yes, very good, I will sit on your cat for one week because that means you’ll have to come with me to watch the Glee concert in 3D when you get back whether you really want to or not.” We don’t do favors or hang out with our friends just because we expect to get something out of it, do we?
This cat is...sitting?
Regardless of why we do things for friends, once you get over the slimy feeling that may come from thinking of the people in your network as resources, it can actually be an empowering thing. I, thankfully, have long played the part of dirty, soulless capitalist, most comfortable when covered in a warm, moist film of slime, so I got over it pretty quickly. Let’s say you want to go to a Florence + the Machine concert: who would you go with? You’re probably mentally scrolling through your Facebook friends list, thinking about which of your friends might like Florence and live music, would be willing to spend a few bucks on a concert, and would be tolerable for a few hours. I know I did, and I knew exactly who to call–roomie from undergrad. We went on the Fourth of July and it was so much fun! But she provided me with a service, didn’t she? She agreed to spend money and time on the concert so I wouldn’t have to go alone. Yes, she probably enjoyed it too (I hope!), but it’s not like we separately decided to go and happened to bump into eachother. She came because I asked her.
That wild yellow blur is Florence!
If you’re very lucky, you have a network of people who could help you out with almost anything. Want to see the newest Harry Potter movie? Maybe your kids will go with you. Want to try a fancy restaurant that just opened? Maybe your girlfriend will join you (maybe in exchange you’ll pay for her dinner). Want to just have a fun, casual night with lots of laughs? I’ll bet you have some go-to buddies with whom you can sit around and talk about nothing for hours.
If you extend your list of resources to your wider network, then we could get some really interesting things done. In social capital terms, your network is made up of strong ties (called “bonding” capital–your family, significant other, closest friends) and weak ties (called “bridging” capital–acquaintances, people you’ve met from work, 95% of your Facebook friends, to be honest). The Kelley School of Business was absolutely tyrannical about expounding the benefits of “networking” to their impressionable graduates. Everyone knows that most jobs are obtained by knowing someone who knows someone. While I hate forced networking events (absolute torture for someone like me), it is pretty incredible to think about all the people you know, all of their skills, all of their experience, and all of the people they know.
If you wanted to start your own business–be it a bakery or a technical consulting service or an event plannery–I’ll bet there are people you know right now who would be happy to help you. Someone could give you with marketing tips (ooh me! meee!!), or maybe someone could put you in touch with the local Better Business Bureau. Maybe you know an accountant (I’m sorry :(), or a tech guru, or a burgeoning chef, or a guy who’s wife’s mother’s best friend is an investor who has been searching desperately for a local startup doing exactly what you’re proposing.
So, yes, it’s a little dirty to think of your ties as capital that you could use to your own gain. But like nearly all capital exchange, social capital is a two-way street, and besides that I believe most people in this world are generally ready and willing to help out people they like. Wouldn’t you jump at the chance to help one of your friends realize his/her dreams?
How about instead of believing that each of us is alone in the world, that like all great success stories we have to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps with sheer personal willpower and stubbornness and that indomitable apple pie-fearing American spirit, we imagine that we are surrounded by circles of people who can help push and lift and coax and threaten us up to what we most hope to be. Better go buy some boots with really long straps.
"Boot" straps?
P.S. What is this? It looks way too complicated!
Leave a Comment